Jesus, Mary, Dominic & Catherine
Couvent de St Charles
Madam vercruysse[1] called at your house this morning, not finding you in town she thought I had better write to you.
Madam kindly sent me to Bruges yesterday in order that I might ascertain wether[2] I could find a Convent to go to. Mr Vercruysse[3] told me that the address of Les Dames de la Retraite came from you Reverend father, for which I thank you. I am sorry to say however that the Pension there is much too high. They take no-one under 5 francs a day, which I suppose must be about 17 hundred francs a year. They gave me the address of two other Convents (videlicet)[4] Convent de Spermallie Rue des Carmes, and the Convent des Soeurs de Charita. Rampert St Catherine.[5] The former had no vacancy. also Pension rather high. The Sisters of Charitys Pension is also higher than Reverend Mother Provinciel is able to pay, & I saw no chance of getting to Brugesp2without confiding in the Superior there that I am a Religious. and asking her to make a little difference for my Convent, of course I would have prefered[6] not telling her this, but it would not be helped, unless I gave up all idea of going to Bruges, as I hear these are the only Convents who take Pensioniers. The Reverend Superior consents to take me for 800 francs without washing, of course if I was sure of finding a lesson or two quickly after my arrival, this arrangment[7] would suit very well, but it seems rather risky work to go there upon this chance I told Reverend Mother that I wished it kept quite secret that I am a Religious, & she promised it should be so. She however seemed a little mistrustful (as is only natural) and wished to know wether[8] I was hysterical or otherwise uncontrolable.[9] if it was only for health I left my Convent &c. may I ask dear father in Christ that you will say a word for me, that is of course if you approve of my going there.
Dear Reverend father I would so much prefer that Reverend Mother Provinciel hears of this Convent from yourself. I am not sure wether[10] she would approve of my making any arrangments[11] for myself. I enclose her card
Reverend Mother Superior at Bruges said she should wait to hear either from youp3Reverend father or from my Reverend Provinciel, before getting my room ready, but that I could go in 12 days time if I wished it.
Madam Vercruysse told me to ask you dear father in Christ to kindly let us know what you think best to do, I know you are pressed for time, but I hope I am not mistaken in feeling you will find time to send me a line, or else to dear Mme Vercruysse
I will be so sorry to lose this kind & good friend so truely[12] simple & charitable also my other good Pupils to whom I feel quite an affection & interest, but I can't have everything. I truely[13] need your direction & firm support. without it I feel quite convinced I should not return to my Convent therefore everything must give way to this.
I went to Confession last week to a Priest in the Jesuits who is only there for a time but I had to make my Confession almost all in french and was so stupidly nervous that I forgot most of the little french I do know. I went again yesterday in Bruges at the Jesuits. & repeated all my last Confession but afterwards felt more troubled than before
you suggested my going dear father to Reverend Mr Fontain, as I am coming back to you I prefer not going at all to himp4to be candid, I don't feel I could make him my Confessor under my present circumstances I know him he is a nice gentleman, I have met him in my visits to Mrs Calewaerts but cannot go to him as my director.
Mme Vercruysse mentioned to me. that you thought Reverend father I had formerly been to the Passionist’s No! I never went there, I only tried one Priest at Zweveghem, & Reverend Pere Mortier on my arrival before coming to you, having once been to you dear Reverend father I saw the Hand of God & thankfully kept to you.
I would be grateful dear Reverend father if you could find time to write again to Stone so that all may be settled for me.
I did not go to The Dames Anglais yesterday as I was not sure if I might make myself known to Our Mothers Niece. I must wait for permission.
Ordo Sancti Dominici